Waffle Iron Vase Jug

by Felix Barbone

 

from the news

 

The building was falling apart

     and a calamity had been locked out

 

A large plastic food jug was

     stuck on a black bear’s head for weeks on end

     and we saw everyone flipping out

 

If you do the math that could

     be a thousand pretty notorious

     synthetic marijuana overdose parties

 

A hiker found the skull in a swamp

     after drinking a beer hale and hearty

 

With a crowbar in hand

     knee deep in basement muck

Stripped away much of the second floor

     using a rare octagonal hockey puck

 

A catacomb of rooms for dancing

     and raves was too much

     enticement for illegal drug lanes

 

Because a drug trafficker plotted

     to move U.S. bound cocaine between South

     and Central America with submarines and planes

 

A man has been sentenced to 15 years in prison

     for killing his mother with a vase

     blaming K2 Spice for his being in a haze

 

The kid next door

     killed the lady down the street

 

When the police arrived

     They caught him chewing on her feet.

 

 

 

 

Felix Barbone is a poet, musician and trained ethnologist. 

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